In response to The Daily Post’s writing prompt: “Audience of One.”
Audience of One
Picture the one person in the world you really wish were reading your blog. Write her or him a letter.
It has been a long long time hasn’t it? Yes I can see the mix of bewilderment, anger and well whatever that other emotion is in your eyes. Like the Oozalum bird, I travel very much in ever decreasing circles and pretty much have arrived at the point when we first engaged in our correspondence only this time with about a decades worth more experience and a few more emotional scars on the way.
What happened all that time ago is the one of the biggest mistakes of my life to date and as a consequence I made myself a much more focussed individual and make sure I know exactly what I want from situations. The power of hindsight is a wonderful thing isn’t? Looking back I should have held back visiting you until I knew for certain I had no interest in you in that way, I think a combination of frustration and loneliness had a little part in clinging onto that little part of the ember of that little crush we had on one another. Also probably reading a bit too much into the songs you selected for my Transatlantic Journey, ironic that one of the songs you selected was called “Should Have Known Better”. But time and tide melts the snowman and reflection I know all I ever wanted out of you was being a very good friend and being my Jazz Buddy, the times when with I was with Pip and I could have really had you to enthuse to about the various Jazz evenings and albums which had cross my paths, I dunno and perhaps we might even had a crack at the forming that band which would probably have given me the focus Pip kept saying I needed. Even if that never happened I think with a bit more encouragement I would have pushed Pip into seriously taking on that Pub up for sale and turning it into a Northamptonshire Jazz Club, ha you could even have been assigned as woman down to design the interior. I think you and Pip would have been good friends and possibly helped bridge the gap between my friends and her friends. What’s more when Pip did dump me via the cold and impersonal method of a Facebook message I could have least had you to turn too.
I miss those old evenings of randomly chatting about nothing ’til the early hours, a void in my life which has never really been filled and since the escapade with Kasia I have long since given up on the romantic front, so you’d need not worry about any silly passes after parties.
It has been a long time old friend, surely 8 years is enough time to bury the hatchet and let the old wounds heel. I guess what I am really saying is I want my old friend back, nothing more. A transatlantic conversation cannot happen with out the other person there to receive it.
So with this I bid you adieu, I hope one day a friend request on Facebook will show up and it will be baring your name and countenance. But until that good on in all your beliefs and prove to me that I am not mistaken in mine.
An old friend