Cuba 2014- Part Four

Parts One, Two and Three can be found by clicking on the links.

After a pretty good day out, I chilled in the bar writing some notes in my journal and reading more of Enter Wildthyme and discovered not only is it a sort of reworking of The Scarlett Empress it is also a sequel of sorts to Magrs’ second who novel The Blue Angel which he co-wrote with Jeremy Hoad, unfortunately I don’t recall much about that novel other the I didn’t really like it, it feature crystal men (who appear here), someone gets abducted by giant Owls and a there is a Jack Russell sitting at a table eating sugar lumps at one point. Judging by Magrs’ choice of titles I had the distinct feeling Magrs was a fan of Marlene Dietrich films. I had a pretty nice dinner, though I did have to explain the concept of a rare steak to the cook on the grill… they looked at me as if I had three heads! The set up is a buffet environment so you can help yourself to various platforms, I’d tend to have the soup, a salad, a “main course” and ice cream or cake for pudding. After this I had a brief nap and went to the lounge bar for a bit and had a few bloody Mary’s. Once the lounge bar was closed I transferred over to the pool bar where Dave, Wyatt, Graham and Scott had just vacated the VIP and we were soon joined by crazy Tracy/Stacy who was out with her husband and proceeded to give very detailed accounts of their bedroom activities. We mostly avoided the conversation at first and we were introduced to a recently wed-couple called Steve and Mark and we spent a lot of time putting the world to rights, with Mark explaining to Wyatt how the UK health service works and Wyatt how the Canadian service works. Mark then had a gander at the book I was reading and concluded that his niece (or was it Steve’s niece) would love the book. We got talking about various ideas I had for short stories, though Mark’s frequent criticism was “yes but you don’t have first had experience of that”, which while true is hardly an issue if you are writing fiction. After all, I doubt Paul Magrs has ever shared a bus ride with a ten-inch talking Panda and a sentient Vending Machine, and if he has- what was he smoking and more importantly where can I buy it? Various amounts of alcohol were necked and the topic quickly changed to our favourite types of Gin. Crazy Stacy/Tracy’s sap was evidently rising as she once again appeared to be on the prowl despite being under the watch of her husband/partner… something which clearly was bothering young Mark… he had a discreet word with Wyatt and I at the bar voicing his concerns that he suspected crazy Stacy/Tracy’s “husband” was a pimp… Baring this is mind we returned to our table and for some bizarre reason Mark burst out into a rendition of “the Court of King Caraticus”, much to Wyatt’s amusement. I guess he’d never heard of Rolf Harris and was luckily unaware of that dreadful song, I quickly explained that Rolf Harris was a big Children and Family entertainer from the 1960s through to the 1990s, but now was in the news for scandal and had been arrest as part of operation Yewtree. So it’s about 2am now and we re drunkenly singing Rolf Harris songs…. Bonkers eh? Mark then asked me about my dodgy knee, “I had been watching you’re gait at the airport and trying to figure what it was,” and despite various ideas and experiments it he was none the wiser but indicated that when there was a stress point else were the pain eased suggesting that it wasn’t a dramatically tricky thing. I just put it down to being old and knackered. Wyatt and Steve had gone off by then (not together I hasten to add) and my offer to Mark to use some heat gel on his bad shoulder got a little bit -misinterpreted, it’s been a long time since he’s been marched out a room apparently…. needless to say he looked quite sheepish the next day.

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Unfortunately due to mis-setting my alarm (somehow I set my alarm for 7am on a Friday in 1996!) I over slept in the morning and missed my bus for that days trip, which was the Island Paradise trip. Having said all that, that might have been for the better as the evening session soon caught up on me and at around 11am it felt like the world came out of my bottom… not something I would like to happen while on a Catamaran. So Friday became a more chilled day by the pool once I had recovered and I even had a dip in the sea and played “avoid being hit by a pedallo”. While I was on my casual wanders I met a guy who was looking a bit bored, basically in the past when he’s gone abroad various hotels have some books for patrons to read, usually donated by fellow holidaymaker’s but on this occasion there was not. So I lent him my copy of The Gun Seller by Hugh Laurie which I had read on the plane and the first few days at the hotel. I had another dip and did about 10 lengths before deciding to join in on a pool game of Volleyball. As the day went on I ran into Wyatt, he said “Ouch!” He’d gone out to Holguin with his Mother for the day and had been offered a hand craft guitar which he was seriously considering buying, but the lack of an form of carry case meant it would not doubt get completely trashed during transit back to Canada.

The evening’s entertainment was a singer but I was having my dinner at the time and ended up in the pool bar having (not so many drink) cocktails with Wyatt and Dave, and later an elderly couple whom I had sat next to on the plane. The guy was a big diving enthusiast and was telling me lots of diving stories, he was quite impressed that I knew a little about bathyscaphe diving… mostly from watching the Avengers but it was accurate. I decided to grab a bit of an early night thanks to heavy night the night before and listened to some music before going to sleep.


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